Question 4

Why should there be a difference in techniques for men and women?

 

 

Because they are different. They are as different as possible. They are polar opposites. Really, the more relevant question would be this: Why should there be similar techniques?

 

There are techniques which are being used by both men and women, not because they are suited to women, but really because special techniques were never developed for them. They have been a neglected part of humanity. All the techniques were developed by men. Basically man was experimenting with himself: he knew about his energy pattern, his routes of energy, his passages of energy.

 

He worked on these. And then he was talking to other men -- so techniques were developed by men for men. Women were never considered.

 

Women cannot enter a Mohammedan mosque. They are not to be a part of Islam really: the mosque exists only for men. For many years Buddha insistently denied women initiation. Mahavir initiated many women, he never denied them initiation, but no techniques were developed for them. All the techniques were for men. Women worked through them. That's why the results were never so miraculous, never; they were always so-so, bound to be. Really, there is no need for three hundred religions in the world, there is only need for two religions: one for men and one for women. And those two religions need not be in conflict, they can be married together. They will become one. There is no need of any conflict. If a man and a woman can fall in love and live together as a single unit, those two religions can fall in love -- they should.

 

The whole physiology, the whole psychology, every layer of the feminine consciousness is different from man's -- not only different, just the opposite. For example, kundalini yoga... it is not for women at all. But many will be shocked if I say that. And women particularly will be shocked. They will think that something has been taken out of their hands. It is not for them at all because kundalini is based on the positive sex center for man. The positive sex center is at the root of the penis -- for men not for women. For women that center is negative, and energy cannot be raised from a negative center. So almost always it is the case -- this is my observation -- that whenever women say they are feeling kundalini arising in the, they are imagining. It cannot happen but they are very imaginary, more imaginary than men. So if I work with ten women and ten men, nine women will feel the energy arising and only one man will feel the energy arising. This is miraculous because it cannot happen! They go on coming to me and I say, "Okay, it is happening." What to do? It is impossible, scientifically impossible, because energy can come only from a positive pole.

 

Totally different techniques should be developed, totally different techniques -- but because man and woman live so near, so close together, they go on forgetting that they are different. Nothing is similar, and it is good that nothing is similar, because that's why they can become one circle of energy. They are complementary, they fit into each other. But because they fit that doesn't mean that they are similar -- they fit because they are not similar.

 

And whenever two similar types of bodies and minds try to fit into each other, this is perversion. So I say that homosexuality is a perversion. In the West, now, it has become more and more prevalent. Now homosexuals think they are progressive: they have their clubs, parties, institutions, magazines, propaganda, everything. And their number is rising. In certain countries it has come to near about forty per cent. Sooner or later homosexuality will become a pattern all over, a normal pattern. Now even certain states in America are allowing homosexual marriage. If people insist, you have to allow it because the government has to serve the people. If two men want to live together in marriage, it is no one's business to create obstacles. It's okay. If two women want to live together, married, it's no one's business. It's their own affair. But this is basically unscientific. It is their affair, but unscientific. It is their affair and no one needs to interfere, but their minds are unenlightened about the very basic pattern of human energy and its movement. Homosexuals cannot develop spirituality. It is very difficult. Their whole pattern of energy movement is disturbed. The whole mechanism is shocked, perverted. And now if homosexuality grows too much in the world, very different techniques will have to be developed, unknown before, to help them to move towards meditation.

 

When I say a man and woman are two counterparts of one whole, I mean they are complementary. And the complementariness is possible only when their opposite poles meet. Look at it in this way: the vagina is the negative pole in the feminine body and the breasts are the positive pole. This is the rod of magnetism: the positive pole near the breasts, the negative pole near the vagina. For man the negative pole is at the breasts, and the positive pole is at the penis. So when breasts meet -- male and female -- negative and positive are meeting; and when sex centers meet in coitus, negative and positive are meeting. Now both magnetic rods are meeting at their opposite poles, now there is a circle -- the energy can flow, the energy can move. But this circle will happen only when a man and woman are in love. If they are not in love, then only their sex centers will meet -- one positive pole will meet with one negative pole. There will be an exchange of energy, but linear. A circle cannot be made. That's why without love you never feel satisfied.

 

Sex without love becomes just a trifle. It is not deep moving. Energy moves, but in a line -- a circle is not made. And when a circle is there you become one, not before. When you are deep in love, then breasts also meet, never before. So the sex act is very easy, the love act is more complex. The sex act is just physical -- two energies meeting and dissipating. Hence, if there is only sex, sooner or later you will feel frustrated: you waste energy and nothing is gained. The gain happens only when there is a circle. If the circle is totally there, then both the partners will come out of the sex act more energetic, more alive, more charged, with more energy flowing. If there is only the sex act, both partners will come out of it discharged, faint. They have lost energy. Sleep will follow because all they are feeling is weak.

 

In this `one pole meeting', men are at more of a loss than women. That's why women can become prostitutes -- because the positive pole is man and the negative pole is woman. Energy flows from man to woman but not vice versa. So a woman can be in twenty or thirty sex acts in one night, a man cannot. A man cannot be in two. It depends on age, how his energy is moving -- because nothing is gained. So to me, if prostitution is bad it is not because of prostitution, it is because a circle is impossible. You are not charged. You simply waste your energy. If there is love, then man and woman meet on two poles. Man gives to the woman and the woman returns it back. This is reciprocal, mutual.

 

For females, meditation will be good if it starts from the breasts. That is their positive pole. Because of this, many strange things become possible, happen. Man always likes to enter the woman immediately. He is not interested in foreplay because his positive pole is always ready. And women are always reluctant to enter into the sex act immediately, without any foreplay, because their negative pole is not ready. And it cannot be ready. Unless the man starts loving the woman from the breasts, the negative pole will not be ready. They can yield but they will not participate. And man thinks the sex act is simple. Why waste time? Enter the woman immediately -- and he is finished within minutes. But the woman was not a part, she was not aroused. That's why women have a hankering that their lovers should touch their breasts, love their breasts -- a deep hankering. Only when their breasts have become filled with energy does their second pole of the magnetic rod, which is negative, respond. Then they are alive to it, then they can participate, then communication is possible -- and then they will melt. Foreplay is a must.

 

Marriages become dry because in the beginning when you meet a new woman you play with her body before. You are not certain whether she will allow you a direct approach, so you play. You just feel the ground to see whether she is ready. But when she is your wife, you take her for granted -- there is no need. Wives are so dissatisfied with their husbands, not because their husbands are not loving but because they are wrongly loving. They don't think that a woman exists in a different way; that her body responds in a different way just opposite to them.

 

This concentration at the breasts, melting into them, will give a new feeling to the female meditator -- a new feeling about her own body, because now from the center she can feel the whole body vibrating. Just by loving the breasts of a woman she can be brought to a deep orgasm because the negative pole will automatically go on responding.

 

There are many other things. If you start from the breasts, meditating on the nipples, don't follow the route that you have read in books because that is meant for men. Simply don't follow any chart, just allow the energy itself to move. It will happen in this way: with just a vague suggestion your breasts will become filled with energy, they will radiate energy, they will become hot, and then immediately your vagina will respond. And only after your vagina responds and vibrates, will your kundalini start working. The route will be different and the way the kundalini will arise will be different.

 

In man it arises very actively, forcibly. That's why they have called it a serpent rising. Very forcibly, suddenly, with a jerk, the serpent unfolds. And it is felt on many points. Those points are called chakras. Wherever there is resistance, the snake forces itself. Just as the penis enters the vagina, so the passage is similar for man. When the energy arises it is as if the penis inside is moving.

 

And the snake is a phallic symbol. Really, not to use direct language, not to call it penis, they have called it a snake. You must have heard the story of the Garden of Eden where the serpent persuaded Eve to eat the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge. Now scholars are working and they say that this serpent is also just a phallic symbol, used so as not to say it directly. So it is not a question, really, of eating the Fruit of Knowledge; it is a question of sexuality.

 

The same symbol has been used similarly in India: the serpent rises just like a penis erecting in jerks, and moving inwards.

 

This will not be the feeling for woman. The feeling will be quite the opposite. As a woman feels when the penis has entered the vagina -- the melting sensation, the welcoming, the vagina giving way, vibrating very, very delicately, in a very receptive mood, loving, welcoming -- the same will be the phenomenon inside. When the energy rises, it will be a receptive, passive rise, as if a passage is opening -- not a serpent rising, but a door opening, and a passage opening, and something giving way. It will be passive and negative. With men something is entering; with women something is opening, not entering.

 

But no one has worked on it, never before, because no one has taken any cognisance of women. But for the future, I think that now it is a must -- the feminine body should not be neglected. Much research and work is needed, but it is very difficult to work because of so much puritanical, moralistic nonsense. It is very difficult to work and to create a map of how the feminine body will respond to the phenomena.

 

But this is how I feel it will be; everything will be just the opposite. It must be so. It cannot be similar. But the ultimate thing will be the same.

 

-Osho, “Vigyan Bhairav Tantra, Vol 2, #28”