Question 2

Beloved Osho,

Somehow i can't believe my laughter, if it's true, but i always believe in my tears. please comment.

 

 

Everybody does it; mankind has been accustomed to misery. Misery is taken for granted; it is thought to be natural. Not to be miserable is dangerous in this vast crowd of miserable people simply because they cannot believe that someone is not miserable -- something must be wrong with him.

 

The society has penetrated deep in your mind; it is not only that others will not believe your laughter, you yourself don't. Your mind is part of the society; it has created it. Your parents, teachers, priests -- they all have created your mind. A mind is something implanted in you by the society; it belongs to the society, not to you. It is society suspecting your laughter, making you afraid that perhaps you've gone insane -- because there is no reason to laugh.

 

It is a very strange situation: when you are healthy, you don't think that there has to be a reason to be healthy. You don't rush to a doctor in panic saying, "Save me doctor, I am healthy! Do something immediately... something has gone wrong, I am no longer sick." Nobody asks, "Why am I healthy?" But if you are sick you ask, "Why am I sick?"; you go to the expert to enquire about your sickness and how to cure it.

 

The same should be the situation about your inner world. Sadness is sickness, and you accept it; laughter is health, and you are afraid to accept it -- you are suspicious of it. That suspicion is not yours; that suspicion belongs to your mother, to your father, to your teachers, to your priest, the church, and all kinds of so-called leaders.

 

If a child is not burdened with all this conditioning, when he is laughing he will accept it naturally. When he is sad he will enquire about why he is sad. He will go to the psychiatrist to enquire what is the cause of his sadness, why he is so serious, why he cannot laugh, why he cannot sing and dance.

 

A person who cannot laugh, cannot sing, cannot dance -- do you think he will be able to love? It is impossible; his love will be a sad affair, full of tears, without any joy.

 

People are finding lovers so that they don't feel lonely. Loneliness hurts, but they are not aware that the other person is also lonely. And two lonelinesses together make the problem multiplied; it does not dissolve the problem. You were lonely; now another person is lonely. You were sad; now another person is sad. Now both will be carrying the sadnesses of each other, sicknesses, seriousness, moods of despair and anguish -- now they are doubled. Before a person falls in love, he should have a right understanding about his own state... is he capable of loving? He cannot laugh, he cannot sing, he cannot enjoy music; he cannot enjoy anything... how is he going to enjoy love?

 

The priests of all the religions have poisoned everything.

 

They have poisoned your love, they have poisoned your laughter.

 

They have poisoned your capacity to rejoice, to dance, to sing.

 

Just look at your churches... The moment you enter a church you become serious -- just watch it. The moment you enter a church the climate inside you changes -- you become serious. You become Christian, which is simply a disease just like Hinduism, Buddhism... different names of diseases.

 

Can you make love in a church? Jesus Christ hanging on the cross looking at you... It will be a very strange scene. You cannot even laugh. Have you seen any statue of Jesus smiling, laughing, dancing? No, all that you know is the crucified Jesus.

 

My own understanding is that Christianity has become the biggest religion of the world because it is a sick religion -- more sick than any other religion. The cross and a serious Jesus -- naturally, on the cross one has to be serious! It will look really odd if he starts laughing on the cross; he has to follow etiquette. His seriousness, his death, his cross have been helpful to millions of miserable people to join his company: "He seems to be the right person."

 

He has told you to carry your crosses on your own shoulders, and you are carrying not wooden crosses, but far more deep psychological crosses of sadness, misery, anguish, anxiety, meaninglessness. These are your crosses. His cross was not that big, and it was something outside him; you are carrying your crosses within your hearts. There seems to be some kind of affinity between you and Jesus Christ.

 

The writer of ZORBA THE GREEK, Kazantzakis was expelled by the Greek Orthodox church because he created Zorba -- a man full of joy, full of love, a man full of music, carrying no cross at all -- a fiction even, and one of the best that this century has created. And the great artist Kazantzakis was expelled from the church because he had done something immensely unchristian.

 

The church does not want you to be happy. Society does not want you to be happy. The psychoanalyst does not want you to be happy. Nobody seems to be interested in your happiness; everybody wants you to be miserable. There must be some vested interest in your misery -- there is: the miserable man is easily enslaved. He is already broken. He has no guts left; he cannot fight, he cannot rebel; he cannot be a revolutionary, he has no hope. It does not matter to him; he is in such misery, what more misery can slavery be?

 

India remained for two thousand years in slavery without a single revolution worth calling a revolution. They call a few things... in 1942 Mahatma Gandhi called his movement a revolution. It is simply untrue. The whole revolution died in nine days. And a country of four hundred million people... How many people participated in the revolution? And why did it die out in nine days? These are not revolutions, just little efforts towards revolution which died before they were born.

 

India was not ready for any revolution; hence, the masses remained aloof -- for them it mattered nothing. They were under the kingdom of Hindu kings before Mohammedans came; they were miserable. Mohammedans became emperors; they were miserable. Britishers came; they remained miserable. Their misery does not change. Why should they bother who is ruling them? Their hearts are so deeply sad that you cannot make them sadder.

 

All governments want people to remain miserable, and all priests want people to remain miserable, because only miserable people go to the priests for consolation. Only miserable people think of paradise; only miserable people want to be assured that blessed are the poor, blessed are the humble because they shall inherit the kingdom of God.

 

For thousands of years misery has been imposed upon you. You are born into it; it is part of your blood and bones. That is the reason that when you feel laughter, to yourself you look awkward, embarrassed. But tears are perfectly okay, because for thousands of years man has been full of tears -- his whole life is nothing but tears.

 

My people are condemned all around the earth. I am condemned for the simple reason that I am telling you to throw the crosses off your shoulders. If you are so much attached to carrying something, carry a guitar -- but a cross is not something to be carried.

 

I have been teaching my people to be happy, rejoicing, loving, because those are natural things which have been repressed. But strange people have the majority under them. I have told my people to drop all old conceptions. For example, you have been told for centuries that love is unspiritual. Love to God is perfectly okay -- that is spiritual love because there is no God, so you can go on praying and be very loving to God who does not exist. But love to a woman or a man is dangerous because the woman is real, the man is real.

 

They have tried to divert your love to a nonexistential thing so you cannot love those who are real. And they have made it clear to you that these two loves are opposite to each other: either you can love a woman or you can love God... strange! I can't think why there should be such a competition between God and a woman. Is God a woman?... so jealous?

 

Why has a man to renounce life and its joys to attain the same pleasures in heaven? What kind of logic is this? Here everything is sin, and the same things in heaven become rewards, to the same saints who were told not even to look at a woman.

 

In India there was a saint, Surdas, who took his eyes out. His name, Surdas has become equivalent to blind man, because to call a blind man "blind man" looks a little inhuman. In India a blind man is called surdas -- the name of a great saint. It simply means a blind man, but looks more sophisticated and does not hurt the blind man. Surdas took out his eyes because he was afraid that if the eyes are there and women are all around... and there are things which are beyond your control. Sometimes you see a face and you like it, you love it. It happens in such a split second that you cannot remember in that second that you are a religious man, you have renounced the world. It is better to get rid of the eyes so you will not see who is man, who is woman, who is beautiful. And this is not an exception.

 

In the Soviet Union before the revolution, there were thousands of men and women -- a very fanatic Christian cult which demanded that you cut your genitals. And people were cutting their genitals to assure the church absolutely about their chastity, celibacy. The poor woman was again at a loss what to cut... the man was going far higher in spiritual growth. Then finally they started cutting their breasts. There were thousands of women who had cut their breasts and they were thought to be very religious. Men who had cut their genitals were thought more religious -- they were saints.

 

All these religions have been poisoning your naturality. My effort is to throw any unnatural conditioning off you, and introduce you again to your innocence, to your nature.

 

Just the other day my secretary Anando reported to me that there are reports in the newspapers that there are sexual orgies here. I said, "But I am here, and you don't invite me either. Great things are happening and I am present, and I have to come to know about great things through newspapers. This is not right."

 

She said, "But no orgies are happening. These are all false reports."

 

I looked into the report and I found what the reason was. It must have come from the hotels and places where my people are staying. No orgies are happening anywhere, but this is part of my teaching: whatever you do, do totally. So when my people are making love, they really love. They groan, they moan, they scream, they dance, they sing. And, you know, the hotel walls are not very thick, so all the neighbors are keeping their ears to what is happening... It must be an orgy! Two persons making so much noise... not possible!

 

They also make love, but they make love according to the tradition that the woman should not move. And to prevent her movement the man is on top of the woman. Now this is beast over the beauty -- he's muscular, he's bigger, and the poor delicate woman is simply crushed under him. What kind of love...? And he is in a hurry to finish it soon because it is a sin -- the sooner finished the better! You should not rejoice in it, you should not prolong it, and your neighbors should not know. So the woman remains quiet, silent, almost a corpse. That is the definition of a lady.

 

A lady is not a woman. A lady is a dead woman; a lady simply means a good lay, she simply lies down and remains with closed eyes.

 

And do you know why women close their eyes when you make love? -- just to avoid seeing you. You are doing such a nasty thing to them, they don't want to see; they don't want the light on. The man is finished within seconds, because only he is making movements.

 

Neither the man attains orgasm nor the woman attains orgasm. Orgasm needs a little more articulateness, a little more skill. Orgasm needs first a long foreplay -- unless sex is accepted as natural, it is not possible -- a foreplay with incense burning, a music record going on, Irene Pappas singing! And before you start making love -- love should not be an immediate thing -- you should dance, you should sing, you should prepare your bodies to rejoice, you should prepare your bodies for the thrill. And waiting is a thrill.

 

You should make love only when it happens naturally, listening to music, dancing, the beautiful fragrance of incense, flowers... Your love chamber should be a temple. I cannot use the word `church'; it is too ugly. That's why I am using the word `temple'.

 

And when your energies are flowing, moving, enjoying and your whole bodies are ready -- not just your minds which want to make love... The woman certainly needs her whole body to be ready because her whole body is orgasmic.

 

Man's sexuality is local, genital; woman's sexuality is all over her body. So by dancing and singing, her whole body will be throbbing, will be getting ready, will be getting warmer. The lady will be disappearing and the woman will be coming back.

 

Of course the lady should be on top, never the man on top. That is inhuman. And that is purely according to sexual science, that the man should be under the woman because then he cannot move much, and if he cannot move much then his ejaculation will not be within three seconds, it will take time. Let the woman move. And when you are in joy, you shout, you scream, you moan, you groan, and you don't care about the neighbors. Then only it is possible for both to come to an orgasm.

 

Orgasm is a gift of nature that leads you to religiousness, because through orgasm you come to know a unity with existence. For a moment you disappear, time stops, mind functions no more... all is silent and all is beautiful; but it is only for moments. But once you have tasted it, you would like it to remain with you twenty-four hours.

 

The first man who must have discovered meditation... I am absolutely certain that the discovery was made through orgasm, because there is no other way to discover meditation. In orgasm all those basic elements are present which make meditation. And some adventurer, enquirer, must have thought, "Why am I feeling so euphoric, so ecstatic?" And he must have noted these three points: I disappear -- a certain am-ness remains, a certain is-ness remains, but there is no I. Time disappears -- there is no past, no future, just the moment, the present. Mind disappears -- no thoughts.

 

Anybody with a little intelligence could have figured out that if these three things can be managed without making love then the same experience will happen. This is the origin of meditation. Nobody knows how many thousand years ago some unknown explorer -- the greatest explorer in the world -- found it out, but it worked. Because with love you are always dependent on the other person, and for two persons there is a certain kind of dependence on each other.

 

Meditation manages to make you egoless, to bring you to the present moment, and to stop the thought process -- and you have a far bigger orgasm without any sex involved in it. Once you have the key in your hands you can remain twenty-four hours in your inner being in the same bliss, in the same benediction.

 

So my teachings look very contradictory to people — they are not. I teach you to make love as totally as possible so that you can transcend it, so that you can find by yourself what is making love such a joyful event -- but it is only for moments. Those three ingredients which constitute orgasm you can try separately, and that's how I have managed meditation. Those three ingredients you can attain. And once you can have an orgasmic experience alone, you are free from women, you are free from men, you are directly in contact with existence -- there is no mediator. Only such a person can go beyond sex.

 

Going beyond sex does not mean that sex was sin. In fact, sex was the cause of all the spirituality that arose out of it. So even the man who has gone beyond sex can enjoy sex just for fun, once in a while. Sex is not against spirituality.

 

When you have experienced orgasm in sex, don't forget the afterplay. Just as there is foreplay which brings you to a thrilling readiness, after orgasm, if you turn your side and you say, "Now I am feeling sleepy," this is insulting. You don't understand the woman; your sex is only genital. Once you have ejaculated you start feeling sleepy because you have lost energy, you have become dull. Sleep will rejuvenate you so the natural cycle seems to be falling into sleep. But the woman's whole body was involved -- she is still throbbing.

 

Modern sexology has come to understand that a woman is capable of multiple orgasms -- one after another, at least six orgasms -- and you have given her only one orgasm. She is still ready for five orgasms, and this is an ordinary situation: the husband goes to sleep, and the wife cries and weeps.

 

If the husband is more considerate -- and he should be more considerate to a woman who has given him such a beautiful experience... He should be considerate: afterplay, a little more music, a little more song, a little more playfulness, or just lying down together. She will cool down; she will again become a lady. Unless she becomes a lady, you are not supposed to go to sleep; when she becomes a lady you can say goodbye and go to sleep.

 

So I know from where those reports are coming. My people are staying in hotels and they must be making a racket. And I don't want you to prevent your rackets -- it is your private affair; it is your private room. You are paying for it. Now what you do in the room is your business; it is not the business of the bishop.

 

Basically, my insistence is on totality. Whatever you do be total in it, be natural in it, and soon you will discover that laughter and joy are natural. Sometimes you may like just to dance for no reason, just because you are so full of energy and the energy wants to dance. Then don't prevent it, don't repress it, because every repressed energy becomes poisonous.

 

Express it, and don't be worried about the world. Take one thing for granted: since you have been with me, the world knows you are crazy. Now there is no problem. They know you are crazy; you need not be worried about them. You be crazily in love with life, nature, so that you can transcend both life and nature. And there is a transcendence waiting for you, but it is only for those who live totally.

 

Then tears may also come, but they will not be of sadness; they will be of joy, they will be of gratitude, they will be of sheer blissfulness.

 

Tears are a language of anything overflowing.

 

If you are so full of sadness then your tears are of sadness.

 

If you are so full of joy the tears will be of joy.

 

I am not saying prevent the tears; they have their own beauty.

 

But they should be of joy, they should be of love, they should come out of your silence, out of your peace, out of your heart in tremendous gratitude that existence has given you life, has given you consciousness, and has given you a crazy friend like me.

 

-Osho, “Socrates Poisoned Again after 25 Centuries, #22, Q2”