Question 1 :
In one of your previous discourses you said that a sudden and direct descent of grace can become a disaster sometimes. the person might be harmed or become mad or he may even die. a question naturally arises: is grace not always beneficial? does grace not keep its own equilibrium? the mishap can also be due to the fact that the recipient was unfit. in that case, how can grace descend on an unqualified person?
God is not a person but an energy.
This implies that energy has no considerations for individuals; whatsoever happens to each individual happens impartially.
For example, the tree on a riverbank receives its nutrition from the passing current; it will bear flowers and fruits and will grow tall and strong. But the tree that falls into the same current will be carried away with the swift tide. Now the river has nothing to do with either of these trees. Neither is it interested in feeding the former nor in destroying the latter. The river just flows. The river is a flowing energy, it is not a person.
We have always made the mistake of looking upon God as a person. Therefore, all our thinking about God is as if he were a person. We say he is very kind; we say he is merciful; we say he always blesses us. These are our expectations and desires that we impose upon God. Though we can impose our expectations on a person and if they are not fulfilled we make the person responsible for it, we cannot do this to energy. So whenever we deal with energy as if it is a person, we are bound to go off track, because then we are lost in dreams. If we deal with energy the results will be entirely different.
For instance, the force of gravity: you are able to walk on the earth because of this force, but this force is not specially meant to make you walk. Don't mistakenly think that if you don't walk, the gravitation will not exist. It was there when you were not on the earth and it will be there even after you are no more. If you walk in a wrong manner you might fall and break your legs. This will also be due to gravity; but for this you will not be able to sue anyone as there is no person to blame. Gravitation is a current of energy. You have to be careful about its laws of functioning if you want to deal with it. But it does not think at all about how to deal with you.
God's energy does not work out of consideration for anyone. In fact, it is not proper to say "God's energy," rather we should say: "God is energy." God does not think about how to behave with you; it has its own eternal law and this eternal law is religion. Religion means the laws of behavior of the energy that is God.
If you behave with discrimination, understanding and in conformity with this energy, it becomes grace for you -- not on its own, but because of you. If you do the opposite, if you go against the laws of the energy, it becomes non-grace-yielding towards you. In this case God is not ungraceful; it is so because of you.
So it will be an error to look upon God as a person. God is not a person but an energy; therefore, prayer and worship hold no meaning. It is meaningless to have expectations from God. If you wish that this divine energy becomes a blessing, grace for you, then you have to do something to your own self; hence spiritual practice has meaning, prayer does not. Meditation has meaning, worship does not. Understand the difference clearly.
In prayer you are doing something with God: you beg, you insist, you expect, you demand. In meditation you are working upon your own self. In worship you are doing something with God; in spiritual endeavor you are doing something on your self. The effort for spiritual growth means that you are transforming yourself in such a way that you are not in a discord with existence, with religion. When the river flows you are not swept away by the current. Instead, you are on the bank where the waters of the river strengthen your roots rather than washing them away. The moment we see God as energy the whole structure of religion changes.
It is for this reason I had said that if the grace descends suddenly and directly it can sometimes become a disaster.
Another thing you have asked: "Can an unfit person be the recipient of grace?"
No, grace never descends on a person unqualified for it. It always descends on a person who is prepared for it. But sometimes an unfit person suddenly develops the necessary qualifications, and he himself is unaware of this. The happening always takes place under the right conditions, just as the light is visible only to those with eyes and not to the blind. But if a blind man has been medically treated so that he can see, and he comes out of the hospital and he sees the sun directly, he will be seriously harmed. He will have to put on dark glasses for a month or two and wait.
If an unreceptive person suddenly becomes receptive, there is bound to be a mishap. The sun cannot be blamed in the case of the blind man. He has to develop the strength of his eyes to bear the sunlight or else there is a danger that he can become totally blind. The first blindness was curable, but now it will be difficult to cure his second blindness.
Understand this well: the experience comes only to those who are deserving. But sometimes there is a possibility of an undeserving person suddenly developing the necessary qualifications due to circumstances of which he himself is not aware. Then there is always a fear of disaster, because the energy descends suddenly and you are not in a condition to bear it.
For example: a man suddenly gets a large amount of money. Usually it should not be of any harm, but if it comes suddenly it may be dangerous. A sudden happiness may also create an accident, because we need a certain capacity to bear it. We become able to bear happiness if it comes upon us gradually. If bliss comes gradually only then we become prepared for it.
This preparedness, the capacity to bear, depends on so many factors. The nerves in the brain, one's physical fitness, one's mental capacity -- all have their limitations, and the energy we are talking about is unlimited. It is like the ocean falling into the drop: if the drop is not prepared in some way to receive the ocean it will merely die; it will be destroyed and it will attain nothing.
To be exact, there is a double line of action necessary for spiritual growth. We have to bring ourselves to the path and become in tune with it. But before that we have to develop our ability to absorb it. These are the two tasks to be accomplished by a seeker. On one hand we have to open the door and improve our eyesight, and on the other we have to wait even after the sight is improved in order for the eyes to be able to bear the brightness of light; otherwise too much light brings an even deeper darkness. This is a one-sided transaction -- the light has nothing to do with it. The responsibility is entirely ours and we cannot blame anyone for it.
The journey of man's life is spread over many lives, and he does many things in each life. Many times it happens that he dies just as he is about to be able to receive grace. With this death he loses all the memories of this life. Working upon yourself through many lives you may have reached up to ninety-nine degrees of growth; dying you will forget all your achievements -- but the existential elements of your inner growth will be carried over to the next life.
There is another person sitting next to you who has accomplished only one degree of growth in his past life. He has also forgotten all about it. You both are meditating: you two belong to a totally different level of growth. Now, if one degree of growth happens the other person will reach only the second degree of growth and grace is not going to descend on him. But with plus one degree of growth you will reach the one hundred-degree point and suddenly grace will descend upon you. This will be sudden for you because you have no idea that you are at the ninety-ninth degree. And so heaven can drop into you all of a sudden and proper preparation should be made for this.
When I say mishap I am only referring to a happening for which we are not prepared. Mishap does not necessarily mean a bad or painful event; it means only the occurrence of that event for which we are not yet ready. Now, if a man wins a lottery of one million dollars it is not a bad happening. But he can die. One million dollars! -- it can stop the beating of his heart. So mishap means the occurrence of an event for which we are not prepared.
The opposite may also take place. If a man is prepared for his death and it comes, it is not necessary that his death is a bad event. If a man such as Socrates is prepared to meet death and welcomes it with open arms, then for such a person death becomes samadhi. He accepts death with such love and joy that he will see that reality which never dies.
We approach death with so much distress that we become unconscious before death. We do not experience death consciously. This is why, even though we have died many times, we are unaware of the process of death. Once you know what death is, then the very idea that you can die will never arise. Then the event of death will take place and you will be standing aside watching it. But this must happen with full consciousness.
So death can be a good fortune for one person and grace can be a misfortune to another. Therefore the spiritual growth is twofold: we have to call, invoke, search and move, and at the same time we have to prepare ourselves for the event so that when light reaches our door we are not blinded by it. If you remember what I have told you in the beginning there won't be any difficulty. If you take God to be a person you will find yourself in great difficulty; if you take him as an energy there won't be any difficulty.
This concept of God as a person has caused a great deal of difficulty. The mind desires him to be a person so that we can transfer all responsibility onto him, and having made him responsible we start to place the burden of every small thing onto him. If a man finds a job he thanks God; if he loses his job he becomes angry with God. If a man gets a blister he suspects it to be the doing of God; if it heals he thanks God. We never consider how we are employing God; we do not even think how egocentric is this attitude in which we assume that God should worry even about our blisters.
If we lose a coin on the road and happen to find it, we say, "By God's grace I found it." We want God to keep our accounts to the last rupee. This idea satisfies our mind because then we can stand at the center of the world. Then our dealings with God are similar to that of a servant before a master. We expect him to stand guard at our door and take care of our possessions to the last coin. The advantage of considering God as a person is that responsibility can be easily placed upon him.
But a seeker takes responsibility upon himself. In fact, to be a seeker means to hold no one but oneself responsible for everything. If there is sorrow in my life I am responsible, and if there is happiness in my life I am responsible. If I am tranquil it is I who am responsible; if I am restless it is my own making. There is no one but myself who is responsible for whatsoever state I am in. If I fall and break my leg it is my own fault and I cannot blame gravity. If this is the attitude of the mind, then you will have understood rightly. Then the meaning of a mishap will be different.
For this reason, I say that grace is beneficial and is a blessing to a person who is well prepared for it. In fact there is a time for everything. There is a special moment for each happening, and to miss this moment is a great tragedy.
- Osho, "In Search of the Miraculous Vol 2, #2"